Ladybug's field notes

I was thinking the other day about the lectures I get from time to time about how I should dress, what I should add to my get-up to give myself a more acceptable (according to patriarchal standards) and/or serious (read, older woman) look, how I should conduct myself, why I should not laugh out loud and the list just goes on! The list is so long that if I actually maintain it for a year, I may not find anything 'right' about me at all! And then there are always those doubts and disapproval about the "right". Was that the "right" place to be? the "right" time to be there? and the "right" reason? Too confusing? Allow me to explain. All my female readers might find it easier to understand.  Please think of the last time you were harassed on the road. No! I am not talking about those every day incidents that we have all learnt so well to ignore, the same way we ignore barking street dogs! It is not about those. I am talking of the in

They say, "Going back to your own past is never easy!" I tasted the uneasiness this week, albeit a bit differently. Murshidabad district of West Bengal is a place that I associate with my childhood as my father belonged to that district. All our holidays were spent near the mighty Ganga. Mighty, cause when I saw the river the Farakka barrage was already built and that brought in huge quantity of water to Ganga ..to much dismay of the neighboring country! It was beautiful to live in the village home surrounded by coconut and mango trees, pond in the backyard and a river flowing at doorstep. I never learnt to fear water. I lived with and loved water. And our love-story continues.. I visited the same place (well! not my village) last week and being a rationale human being, I knew I could not expect to go back to the fun and frolic of my childhood. After all I was going to one of the poorest districts of the country. Murshidabad is famous for all the wr ong reasons.  It i

My friend from a land rights movement support group was aghast! She could not believe her ears. A fellow country-man landed in Delhi to 'support' the march of the tribes for land rights and seemed visibly disturbed on not finding a welcome committee with garlands, cars to take him to the venue 180 km away. He was also worried about being cheated by Indians and warned my friend against the same too! "They are basically cheats, you see!" My friend lost her cool, "Why did you come to India to stand by Indians in the first place? and you say you are a supporter!" But, this was a Frenchman! I thought of my experience during the trips with the Indians (not bharat ke log...but Indians), mainly from donor agencies and at times national capital based NGOs, to various parts of the country. I found a similar echoing in the sentiment. They couldn't think who to blame other than the rural women for remaining unlettered and not sending their children to school! &qu