Why I am a Hindu.... (Caution: Proceed with ample quantities of salt)

I feel pretty Hindu at times. More Hindu than most Hindus, who can not tell Surya Mantra from Gayatri Mantra and seven sages from seven ages! Especially when it comes to stories, I feel almost exclusively Hindu. Hindu gods and goddesses and the stories around them fascinate me to no end! I can hear these stories forever and ruminate on them like the holy cow, herself! I hereby proclaim that doubting in my Hindutwa will be doubting the Panchatatwa itself. You don't know Panchatatwa?! Errr..well! Never mind! Lets concentrate on the story.

It was the day before yesterday that this god named Bhairav caught my fancy. You can spot a Bhairav temple near the old fort area of Dilli, which is claimed to be from the era of Pandavas of Mahabharata fame. Who is this Bhairav? My driver who is a devotee of this god, could not tell me. My common-sense was saying that this god will be linked to Shiva. Two reasons. Every god with a non-descriptive name is linked to some famous name from the Purana (Hindu scripture). Or in other words a link has to be established to the more famous of the 330 million gods and goddesses of Hindus. The second clue was that to appease this god one needed some alcohol. And Shiva, the Mahadev's lust for intoxication is well known. Imagine how much the devotees would love a god who can be offered alcohol! This also shows the origin of the strong bond that Pauranic Brahminical religion share, with the indigenous religions of India. You can travel from the shrines of Maran Buru (Santhals) to Niyamraja (Dongriya Kondhs) in the tribe areas, all you need, is a bit of alcohol to propitiate all of them. Alcohol is such a bond-creator! 

There are more than 8 Bhairavs. It tickles my brain whether each one of them would be part of these 330 million or Bhairav is only one or Bhairav is not counted as one as he is Shiva himself. I frankly do not know but it keeps me intrigued. 

Hindu gods and goddesses enthral me more than any other gods and goddesses, mainly because of their human like characteristics. These characteristics make them irresistibly close to my heart. Their claim to fame are such incidents that the even the most miserly among us will spend billions to hide.  Theft, incest, rape, abduction, deceit, you name it, they have done it. Much like all of us. And all of these are viewed as "leela", that is, it is their way of imparting the mortals like us some reasonably mysterious knowledge that required that big an act of abomination! Vishnu is my favourite at that! Vishnu and his million plus amazing stories.

According to Padma Purana, the Tulsi plant was a woman named Vrinda or Brinda. She was married to the demon-king Jalandhar. Due to her piety and devotion to Vishnu, her husband became invincible. Even god Shiva could not defeat Jalandhar. Therefore, Shiva requested Vishnu to find a solution. Vishnu disguised himself as Jalandhar and lured Vrinda to bed. To cut the long story short, Vrinda's chastity thus destroyed (whatever that means!), Jalandhar could be killed by Shiva. Are you now finding it difficult to keep in mind by now that Vrinda was Vishu's devotee? Sounds similar to so many incidents in modern day India. You are violated by the person you trust the most. And the nightmare does not end in one life. Vrinda gets married to the perpetrator in the next life. Tulasi is married to Vishnu. Some people will tell you that Vrinda cursed Vishnu and he turned into a black stone, the Shalgram Shila. Twist in the tale? Shalgram Shila is worshiped in many Hindu homes. A rapist being worshiped?! Now this is the problem with the "gender terrorist" types such as me, we quickly get entangled into stories of women oppression. Lets focus on Vishnu.

As described in Vishnupuran, one of the demon kings, most probably Hiranyakashipu, pleased Brahma, the creator of the Universe to get a boon that he could not be killed in any of the 3 worlds - heaven, hell, or earth. He never worshiped Vishnu. This demon king went and challenged this god on a dual. And how they fought! They fought for days, months and years. Thousands of years passed but neither could defeat the other. When they both were very tired, Vishnu called out to the demon king and said, "I am happy with your fighting skills and bravery. Come! Get killed by no other but me, the Vishnu!" The demon king said, "Oh Vishnu! How will you kill me? There is no place in the three worlds where I can be killed!" To that Vishnu said, "You can be killed on my thigh. Come and lie there so that I can kill you". Now think of this. A king who fought for thousands of years with Vishnu agrees to be killed by him, the one who could not defeat him in a war. It fascinates me to no end! Why would one like this god and not the demon king instead? The demon kings, the Asuras have taken care of their subjects well, some of their kingdoms have been called "golden kingdom" but we have to believe that it was for their own good that these gods killed them. It was only by being killed by these divine persons they could attain moksha/nirvana! You are even led to believe that the main purpose of these demons was to be killed by the gods (refer: Ramayana).

And then of course there are the 9 Avatars of Vishnu and the affair with Radha by one of them. This is one thing I really love about Krishna. His love for Radha. My father used to get regularly angry if we even attempted to hear any of the folk-lores and/or dance/song dramas around Radha and Krishna. He thought this man was a "lumpen". Don't go by the dictionary meaning, because as my scholar friend mentions, Krishna was anything but a dictionary lumpen. My father, like many other Bengalis of his generation, used it to describe him as that as the word sounded similar to "lampat" or characterless in Bengali. After all Krishna spent the night in another woman's house and then came back to Radha seeking pardon! My father could not stand him and I think he was more Catholic than Communist in his views regarding this. My point was different. At least he was ready to hold her feet to his chest and seek pardon. Radha was important to him beyond his own ego. How many of his devotees would think of doing so in a non-inebriated state? Will any modern Hindu man follow his "this" god? Radha was  much older to Krishna, she was his aunt, had a husband who was not good enough (tickles your brain?) and hence she thought of asserting herself with the help of this much younger man and in the process turned into a goddess. A goddess, mind you!

Now on to my friend's favourite story. Bali Raja was the most powerful and just king ever known. His rule was known as the golden age. Folk song about Maha Bali or Maha Vali says, "Maveli nadu vaneedum kalam, manushyarellarum onnu pole" or "All the people were equal when Maveli ruled". His subjects loved him so much that they forgot to worship the gods and instead worshiped their king. Bali was the king of the three worlds. His guru Shukracharya, who was immensely knowledgeable helped him. One day during a yajna, a midget Brahmin approached him and asked for three steps worth of land. Bali was known for his generosity. He smiled and said, "Step wherever you like!" The the midget Brahmin started getting bigger and bigger till his head touched the sky. He stepped from heaven to earth in the first step and from earth to the neither-land in the second step. And then he asked, "Now where shall I take the third steep Bali?" By then Bali knew he had been tricked by Vishnu and said, "I deserve this my lord as I have been too hubristic. Please step on my head". Vishnu stepped on his head and pushed him to patal-lok (underworld) and condemned him to stay there. His subjects cried bitterly and mourned the loss of their beloved king. Even Vishnu's eyes got misty seeing their plight. He therefore granted Bali an annual parole when he could visit his subjects. Bali is considered the greatest devotee of Vishnu now and stays in the underworld except this one day! Till this day Bali's subjects (Hindus, Muslims and Christians) celebrate him and the beginning of the new/prosperous year during Onam. During which someone dresses up as Bali Raja and girls dance around him. 

 I can never be a Muslim with only one old man to perform all the "leela". The poor guy did his best but was no match to Vishnu who had several thousand years and many different Avatars for help. I can not be a Christian either. It has only one Jew boy with almost no interesting stories up his alley. He could not even manage a proper love story. Thank you! But I am not interested in how many sick was miraculously cured. Come and visit AIIMS hospital next time you visit Delhi. They will present a better number. 

Aaah! Hinduism and its road to heaven and goddess-hood and moksha! They will keep me enticed forever. Sorry Kancha Ilaiah! No one can dissuade me from the road of goddess-hood :P And I shall remain forever yours Hinduism....